18 h. ago There are only two things wrong with this England team. They can’t Baz. And they can’t ball | Barney Ronay

Even losing seems to involve doing so without the qualities that were supposed to make England winIt’s a cruel, cruel summer. By the close of play in Adelaide, on the kind of superheated afternoon when just going outside basically involves setting fire to your own hair, it was clear this was the day the music finally died for England’s Ashes tour; even if that music has long since faded, like the tinkle of a haunted pianola in an empty house.The start of day two had presented a familiar challenge. Here was another occasion where it was necessary to bat properly. And yes, it is always this day. The bat properly day. Do it. Do the batting. The proper batting. By now this seems to raise some very basic existential questions. Continue reading...

Politics

3 d. ago If Harry Brook is truly a generational talent, that promise needs to be delivered now | Barney Ronay

Arguably the poster-boy for Bazball, England’s vice-captain is in dire need of an innings of substance in Adelaide“They were shocking shots. I’ll admit that every day of the week. Especially the one in Perth. It was nearly a bouncer and I’ve tried to drive it. It was just bad batting. The one in Brisbane I’ve tried to hit it for six. That’s what I mean when I say I need to rein it in a bit.”Oh yes, Harry. This is real transgression. Inject that mild good sense into my throbbing veins. Trash talk binned. Mind games deactivated. Tell me about reining it in again. Shock me with your filthy, filthy conservatism. Talk sensible to me baby. Continue reading...

Politics

6 d. ago Schmaltz, theatre and sharp teeth: Wrexham reveal the hard truth about football | Barney Ronay

With the arrival of US hedge funders at Wrexham, there is no pretence any more. This is just another project, as it always wasTea and cake. Cobble-close streets. Collectivism. Sugar rush. Hollywood fairytales. And also, as of this week, a minority owner with historical links to celebrity paedophile Jeffrey Epstein.Wait! Welsh cakes! Welsh tea! Aggregated tourism benefits. The sloeblack, slow, black, crowblack, fishingboat-bobbing sea. And also, at one remove, historical links to deceased celebrity paedophile financier Jeffrey Epstein. Continue reading...

Politics

1 week ago BBC showing tennis’s new Battle of the Sexes will just offer up opportunity to belittle women’s sport | Barney Ronay

The match between Aryna Sabalenka and Nick Kyrgios opens up a direct channel between the BBC of old and a world of toxic internet hatredIt’s always best to take a sceptical view of the constant flow of BBC-bashing newspaper stories, which are often simply bogus outrage expressed for commercial gain. Even the war-on-woke, cod-ideological stuff – Clive Myrie INSISTS hamsters can breastfeed human robots – the bits that make you want to smear your face with greengage jam and weep for England, our England, with its meadows, its shadows, its curates made entirely from beef. Even these come from a hard, transactional place.Basically, it’s the licence fee. The BBC is free at the point of delivery, but paid for by a national levy. The BBC is also a direct commercial competitor to every other form of legacy media, all of which are trying to find ways to survive and recoup revenue. Continue reading...

Events

2 w. ago Joe Root is finally a wizard in Aus after Harry Brook’s Bazball scarecrow act | Barney Ronay

A tale of two Yorkshiremen, one keeping England in the series, the other batting without a brainIn the end even the celebration was perfect, out there under that strange deep-blue southern sky, in the frenzy of the game-state – manic Baz energy, England’s lower order scything away death cult-style at the other end, the way even the grass seems lacquered and glazed by the lights.So yeah. All that stuff. In the middle of this Joe Root guided the ball away through fine leg to complete his first Test hundred in Australia, then marked it with a gentle smile and a wave of the bat, no fist-punching, no monkeys off backs, no angsty and pointed messaging. Continue reading...

Politics

2 w. ago Majestic Root basks in Australian glory at last but Brook’s folly could be costly | Barney Ronay

A tale of two Yorkshiremen, one keeping England in the series, the other a scarecrow batting without a brainIn the end even the celebration was perfect, out there under that strange deep-blue southern sky, in the frenzy of the game-state – manic Baz energy, England’s lower order scything away death cult-style at the other end, the way even the grass seems lacquered and glazed by the lights.So yeah. All that stuff. In the middle of this Joe Root guided the ball away through point to complete his first Test hundred in Australia, then marked it with a gentle smile and a wave of the bat, no fist-punching, no monkeys off backs, no angsty and pointed messaging. Continue reading...

Politics

2 w. ago If we are witnessing the death spiral of the cult of Bazball, let’s savour what it created | Barney Ronay

There have been many good points – challenging orthodoxies and Ben Stokes talking openly about male emotions – and even when it was bad, it was unignorableThe Life Cycle of a Cult1. The Big Idea. A charismatic leader or leaders propose a new and transcendent idea that promises a panacea for alienated and vulnerable people.So here we are then. They’re getting ready to storm the compound down in Brisbane. The gunships are circling. Smoke is rising from the out-houses. A lone figure, naked, shivering, the words HIGH RELEASE POINT smeared across his chest in chicken blood, has come staggering through the lines and is being led away under a blanket towards an inconclusive loan stint at Derbyshire. Continue reading...

Events

3 w. ago Can Arne Slot revive this Frankenstein’s monster of a Liverpool side? | Barney Ronay

New players have come in, too many of them, and has meant a dilution of the collective will instilled by KloppBefore this game Arne Slot had announced that he was “almost confused”. Which does at least raise some tantalising questions. Mainly, what is this Liverpool team going to look like when he gets there, when a state of full confusion is finally attained, when even Slot’s confusion stops being confusing and reveals its diamond-cut final form.A 4-1 home defeat, Liverpool’s ninth in the past 12 games, felt like a step towards that promised end. Or at least confirmation their season has now reached the gallows humour phase – one of those periods where events haven’t just run away from you, but appear to be openly mocking your best efforts to catch up. Continue reading...

Politics

3 w. ago Arsenal’s Eberechi Eze finds own plane just above ground level to sink Spurs | Barney Ronay

The England forward has made a decent start to his Emirates career but this performance was stick-it-on-a-mural stuffHas there ever been a softer, more delicate act of derby day brutality than this, a hat-trick in a 4-1 win where every goal must have felt like being bludgeoned to death with a feather‑light Parisian macaron?Eberechi Eze’s third goal, the killer, the legend-maker, was the funniest, and also the most telling. It was made by a thrust down the left, and by Leandro Trossard’s smart pass. But it was made as an aesthetic by Destiny Udogie falling over, not because of any real act of trickery, but because Eze stopped suddenly, out there in the middle of all that heat and light, taking the ball on the edge of the Spurs box and simply ceasing to move, like a squirrel on a branch. Continue reading...

Politics

3 w. ago Alastair Cook and Becky Ives make best of TNT Sports’ shonky Ashes production | Barney Ronay

Presenter Ives was breezy, while Cook fronted everything like the last ceremonial horse of some dying cavalry unitYou know what they say. Never judge a pitch until both teams have batted really badly on it. You know what they say. Over here you bat long, bat hard, bat short, bat soft. You know what they say, the Ashes in Australia is all about a hybrid maverick production with a fan-first identity.Given the brilliance of the basic entertainment on day one in Perth, it was easy to forget that England’s Baz-facing tourists aren’t the only setup with a brave new philosophy in play, out there disrupting the norms, and in need, above all, of a decent start. Continue reading...

Society