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We use silly voices with each other – and it makes it hard to have a sex life

Being playful has made me feel more like a mother and carer than a wife. Can we change this dynamic?My wife and I have been together for seven years. I honestly can’t remember the last time we had sex – it’s been at least a few years. For most of our relationship, I’ve taken on the role of caretaker. She struggles with anxiety, was recently diagnosed with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and often needs a lot of emotional hand-holding. Over time, it’s taken a toll on how I see our relationship. We also fell into a habit of using silly, childish voices with each other. What started out as playful has ended up making me feel more like her mother than her wife. For a long time, I didn’t have much of a libido, and to her credit, she didn’t push the issue. But now that my sex drive has returned, it feels as if it’s all I can think about – except I just can’t seem to feel that way about her any more. Every time I’m briefly tempted to initiate something, it gets snuffed out ...


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