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My husband treats me as his dirty little secret – and won’t have sex at home

He prefers to get intimate in anonymous spaces and initiates sex every time we’re at someone else’s house. I love the excitement, but feel manipulatedMy husband and I never have sex at home, only at our friends’ places or in hotel rooms. We’ve lived together, improbably, for four years now. When we hooked up six years ago I never expected anything serious, just a one-night stand with a hot flight attendant.After 15 casual sexual encounters we had a screaming row about my sleeping with someone else, and after the 16th, we decided to be in an exclusive relationship. After 40 meet-ups, he brought home an exotic strain of gonorrhoea; when we had got over the shock, and finished a course of antibiotics, we started planning the wedding.Pamela Stephenson Connolly is a US-based psychotherapist who specialises in treating sexual disorders.If you would like advice from Pamela on sexual matters, send us a brief description of your concerns to private.lives@theguardian.com (please don’t send at...


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